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Joke of the Day

"[first date] Me: *don't let him know you're the Mona Lisa* Him: You look nice tonight Me: *smiles ambiguously*"

"I accidentally had two energy drinks today and now my house is decorated for Christmas."

"Was kind of surprised at all the swearing when I unplugged the church organ to charge my phone."

"International Women's Day That's the joke"

"Why did the snowman smile? He heard that the snow-blower was in town."

"Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because the D shells are too big, and the B shells are too small."

"How can a black woman tell if she is pregnant? When she goes to pull out her tampon and all the cotton's been picked."

"What's the best way to break up with your girlfriend? On the front page of reddit."

"All of the firefighters at my station are quick. They're even ""fast"" asleep!"

"Where did Little Johnny go when the bombs dropped? Everywhere."