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Joke of the Day

"Why ebola medicine doesn't work in Africa? Because it can't be taken on empty stomach"

"How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it."

"They say a woman does better research than the FBI... Good thing a man can hide secrets better than the CIA."

"There are three fourth graders, a white boy, a black boy, and an asian boy. Who have the biggest dick? The black kid. Cause he's 21. People here get butthurt by the simplest jokes. Good lord."

"Why do all black people have nightmares? Because the last one to have a dream got shot."

"Her: Can I see your phone? Me: Cu-caw! Cu-caw! Cu-caw! **Flaps imaginary wings and flys into another room**"

"What do you call the upper eighth of a lime for sale? A top-of-the-lime model."

"The fast and the furious 8 (spoiler alert)"

"If Jesus was a cat we'd have nine Easters."

"My favorite part of eating alone at this trendy restaurant was when the waitress asked if I had cats because I had cat hair, ""all over."""