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Joke of the Day

"Her: Can I see your phone? Me: Cu-caw! Cu-caw! Cu-caw! **Flaps imaginary wings and flys into another room**"

"I really hate the word ""subcutaneous."" Idk, for some reason it just gets under my skin."

"What is the difference between a snowman and a snowlady? Snowballs!"

"Ghostbusters (1984): A large, jovial marshmallow sailor is burned alive amid the crossfire btwn humans and ethereal beings."

"[ during job interview ] - ""Why do you think you would make a good asset to our team?"" - ""I give up, why?"""

"Hey, I fucked your mom last night. *Sigh* I know dad..."

"A woman recently got breast implants made from oak wood. It would be funny if this joke had a punchline, Wooden tit?"

"What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? The pizza can feed a family of 4."

"I do not enjoy eating chicken... ... it leaves a fowl taste in my mouth."

"My homework brings all the Asians to the yard, and they're like ""It wasn't that hard"""