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Joke of the Day
"The time traveler was still hungry after his meal... So he went back four seconds."
Next Joke
"Tombstone request: Born a virgin, lived a virgin, died a virgin. The engraver shortened it to: "" Returned unopened."""
"I'm sick of closing out every job interview with ""I was young. I needed the money."""
"I'm more excited to see my suitcase come down the baggage carousel at an airport than I am to see most people."
"Did you hear about the man that flashed three nuns? Two had a stroke and one couldn't reach."
"There's a fine line Between a numerator and a denominator."
"Here is a joke I just read Question: How many vegans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Answer: I'm better than you."
"[10 mins into couples therapy] Therapist: I cannot help you two. Me: Let's go, Betsy! See! She doesn't listen! T: GET YOUR DOG OFF MY COUCH!"
"""Does my bum look big in this dress?"" my wife asked this morning. I said ""No, but the dress does look quite small on your arse""."
"What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye matey"