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Joke of the Day

"I'm more excited to see my suitcase come down the baggage carousel at an airport than I am to see most people."

"*Claps along at an opera*"

"What do you call a corn farmer who wakes up one morning to find that complex branching pathways have been cut into his field? amaized."

"Just remember... you're unique... Just like everybody else."

"My doctor said I have high cholesterol Because my dick is too fat"

"Tinfoil: Viserys Targaryen is a hipster. He wore a crown before it was cool."

"What do you call an expert at making ship parts? A master master."

"Did you guys read about the fence that got knocked over this morning? Dont worry, it'll probably be reposted before the weekend is up."

"Why did God create a man before a women? You need a rough draft before you have a final copy."

"What do you call a hooker with a runny nose? Full."