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Joke of the Day

"After his final sex-change operation, what kind of wood won't Bruce have any more? Sbruce"

"Imagine me with poor grammar. Wrong. Worser."

"I swallowed my NyQuil with a 5 Hour energy and a latte and now my pet unicorn Steve and I are off to bake cheesecakes."

"Homework is like a penis.... its long and hard unless you're asian."

"I'm agnostic. What happens to me when I die? Idk. (I decay)"

"Drops empty vodka bottles in all the neighbor's recycling bins. So the garbage men don't think it's just me."

"If you hear one of the high piano keys repeating slowly, you're either watching a trailer for a horror movie, or you are a parent."

"What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds? Government bonds mature over time and earn money"

"Why did the redditor go to /r/zelda? To boost his link karma!"

"What do you call Benedict Cumberbatch in The Imitation Game? Homogeneous."