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Joke of the Day
"I had an arguement with a philosophy major I told him NO, I don't want avocado on my footlong!"
Next Joke
"Just watched Die Hard 2. People in 1990 sure knew how to shrug off a plane crash."
"My dad once told me I would make a great mime... I was speechless."
"Autocarrot sucks!"
"She said she was turned on by men who took risks. So he took the plastic off his iPhone screen."
"There is no better karate instructor than a spider web in your face."
"Nothing's says I'm guilty of every crime imaginable quite like using your blinker to pull into your driveway..."
"Something on Valentines Day I just don't get... Laid."
"I saw a chameleon today. I guess it was a pretty crappy chameleon."
"Thanks, student loans, for getting me through school I don't think I could ever repay you"