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Joke of the Day

"How many Freudians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw in the lightbulb and one to hold the penis. I mean ladder, one to hold the ladder."

"I caught myself whistling the Unsolved Mysteries theme while hiding a body."

"I love slip on shoes because you can slip them off just as easy to hit stupid people with them."

"""Hey, what time is it?"" 9:11"

"My superhero name is Typoman. I am the writer of wrongs."

"What did the calf say to the silo? ""Is my fodder in there?"""

"The best freestyle ever Roll up to someone with pancakes Drop my iPhone on it Call it ihop I'll see myself out"

"By the year 2020, the word ""Silly"" will be considered Harmful. It will be replaced by ""Seriously Challenged."""

"Boss told me to glue 2 pieces of wood together Totally nailed it"

"Saw my neighbor in a peeing contest with his dog on his porch. My mum said there'd be days like this but she never said there'd be so many."