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Joke of the Day

"Warner Bros. before Warner Hos."

"A Gnome and A Reindeer take a picture together What is it called when a gnome and a reindeer take an instant picture of themselves - A S-ELF-IE POLE-ROID"

"Why does Helium go up? Because the floors Argon."

"Friend: ""Did you bring condoms?"" Me: ""No need. If I'm drunk enough to talk to a girl, I'm way too drunk to get it up."""

"I wish it was my job to sit around laughing at tweets all day. Actually, he is unaware, but that's what my boss is paying me to do anyway."

"What did the doctor say to the injured gingerbread man? Why don't you try icing it"

"So my uncle is starting a summer camp... It's for kids about to be molested."

"The ducks in Cern What does the ducks in Cern say? Quark Quark"

"Look... don't end your presentation with ""Are there any questions?"" & then get all pissy when I ask if you can ride a unicycle."

"If your new boyfriend carved your initials into a tree on your first date, let the fact he brought a knife be a sign of things to come."