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Joke of the Day
"What's a polar bear? It's a Cartesian bear after a coördinate transform."
Next Joke
"How did Helen Keller's mother punish her? She left a plunger in the toilet"
"Buzz Aldrin was the second man to step foot on the moon. Neil before him. Neil."
"You know what the definition of ""competitive"" is? Finishing first *and* third in a circlejerk."
"I met a girl named Nirvana yesterday... I asked her ""Did your parents give you than name while you were still In Utero?"". She was like ""What?"".. I just shook my head and said ""Nevermind...""."
"[impatiently yells] ""What do I have to do to get a margarita around here??"" And that's when I got kicked out of Dairy Queen."
"My patient was refused his organ transplant. But I didn't have the heart to tell him."
"What's the difference between wild Iranian Ossetra caviar and my penis? One is a delicacy (Deh-Lih-Cuh-See) and the other is a delicady (Deh-Lih-Cuh-Dee) Edit: The D"
"God doesn't play dice well, that's what he tells Mrs God."
"Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear rug on his floor. The bear isn't actually dead. It's just too afraid to move."