134803

Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear rug on his floor. The bear isn't actually dead. It's just too afraid to move."

"This is my ""go to"" dirty joke ...always What did one tampon say to the other..... nothing, they are both stuck up cunts. ba dum tiss"

"When I found out my girlfriend was having a baby my life really changed. specifically my name, address and phone number."

"A fondue party... But instead of bread, it's more cheese. And instead of people, it's even more cheese."

"I have a friend who won't admit that he dresses up as Santa every year. He's pretty deep in the Clauset."

"My wife's boss's name is Adolfo! I wonder if his family have always been against dolls?"

"Two muffins were in an oven. One says to the other, ""Damn, it's hot in here."" The other one says, ""Holy shit! A talking muffin!"""

"What do you call a pessimistic pelican? A pelican't."

"Why is Donald Trump's pet bee so unwilling to share information? It's a cagey bee."

"first rule of fight club is no fightig. welcom to contradicton club evryone hav a seat adn dont hav a seat. also this isnt contradicton club"