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Joke of the Day

"911: what's your emergency? M: I'm out of ketchup. 911: miss I don't think u get how 911 works. M: I DONT THINK U GET HOW HOT DOGS WORK"

"I like your name Thanks I got it for my birthday"

"What's black and white and red all over? A penguin with a rash."

"How come Miss Piggy couldn't talk? She had a frog in her throat."

"Your mamma so ugly, she walked into a haunted house and came out with a job application!!"

"A blind man walks into a bar... And a chair. And a table.."

"What body regulates the welfare of Santa's workers? The Elf and Saftey Executive."

"Guy jogging pushing stroller for two kids. But only one there. Don't think he knows he lost one."

"What's the best thing about being named Richard? Every picture of me is a Dick pic. Which is to say my own mother hangs Dick pics on her walls."

"Hangovers vs Women Why are hangovers better than women? Hangovers go away!"