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Joke of the Day

"Men don't get lost; they discover alternative destinations."

"What did the rich socialite's parrot say? Polly want a cracker with cavier please!"

"Customer: Give me a hot dog. Waiter: With pleasure. Customer: No with mustard."

"Plastic bags biodegrade quicker than my mum getting to the point on the phone."

"When I die I want to go quietly, in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming and freaked out, like his passengers were."

"Did you hear about the kidnapping at the elementary school? It's ok now, he woke up."

"whats the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator the refrigerator doesn't fart when you take the meat out."

"My first time having sex was like my first time riding a bike... My dad was holding me from behind"

"The cannibal arrived late to the dinner party. He was given the cold shoulder."

"A polio survivor walks into a bar...... Wait I fucked it up."