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Joke of the Day

"The cannibal arrived late to the dinner party. He was given the cold shoulder."

"Ive tried everything to get my dog to behave. Ive tried shoving it into a wool tube, stabbing it in the neck and head, etc. nothing works."

"The entire city of Detroit burned down last night. Estimated damage is $6."

"What's the difference between swine flu and avian flu? Bird flu needs tweet-ment and the swine flu needs oink-ment! Ha"

"A policeman just knocked on the door. He said, ""It looks like your wife has been in an accident..."" I said ""Yes but she has a great personality!"""

"What has two arms and 14 legs? Guy who collects legs."

"""Mos Def"" is my favorite rapper named after a girl who doesn't actually plan on hanging out with you."

"I like my women like I like my wine Red and full of alcohol."

"What instant coffee and Sasha Grey have in common? 3 in 1"

"This could be the LSD talking, but I'm pretty sure I'd be more comfortable riding on the roof of the car."