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Joke of the Day

"The soul weighs 21 grams. We know this because the Jurassic World film reels are 21 grams lighter than Jurassic Park"

"Why was the blonde girl sitting on the roof? Someone told her drinks were on the house."

"5 steps to a happy marriage: 1. Doritos 2. Oreos 3. Pez 4. Mr. Noodles 5. Oops this is my grocery list. 6. Still applicable."

"How do you know it was not U.S. that did the aerial bombing? Because the funeral, wedding and hospital were not the targets."

"Fun WWI fact: There are more crashed planes down at the bottom of the ocean than- -crashed submarines in the sky."

"Where do Dutch sheep go at night? TO SHLEEP! :D"

"Motels may wanna take down that ""Color TV"" sign. We know."

"I used to be a man inside a woman's body... but then I was born."

"How many unemployed actors does it take to change a light bulb? (fixed) 100. 1 to change it and 99 to stand around and complain about how they coulda done a better job."

"When I think of all the money I've spent on booze in my life, I wish I had it all back. Imagine all the booze I could buy!"