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Joke of the Day

"It's so freeing to be single again because now I can finally catch up on all the things I've been meaning to do like being really lonely."

"People who tweet about politics should have to pass a small test: if i say ""Oh, look, a dead bird,"" and you look UP, we take your phone away"

"A new zoo opened up in my town, but it only has one dog. It's a shih tzu"

"A short Ramadan joke Why does Ramadan go by so quickly?!?!? Because we fast."

"Why is Jesus so bad at hockey? Because he keeps getting nailed to the boards."

"Guess what I'm going to do if I get Alzheimer's?"

"I have insomnia. I have insomnia My doctor says it's very common and that I shouldn't lose any sleep over it."

"Last night I bought an alcoholic ginger beer, he wasn't happy about it."

"I thought I was electrocuted. But in a shocking twist, I survived. . . . Try the Veal."

"On my deathbed I'll be so glad I watched tons of tv & didn't travel."