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Joke of the Day

"I don't understand all of this Chris Brown hype. After all his music isn't even that good, his only decent hit was Rihanna."

"I overdosed on my homeopathic medicine today. Forgot to take it."

"Just beat Guitar Hero on expert in case anyone is looking for a virgin to sacrifice before midnight."

"Q: who was the world's first carpenter? A: Eve, she made Adam's banana stand!"

"Did you hear that M. Night Shyamalan is making a new movie about a ninja with a nipple fetish? You'll never see the twist coming"

"ME: So you indicate action using airstrikes? HER: What? No, I said asterisks. ME: Ha, of course. [to walkie-talkie] Disengage. DISENGAGE!"

"What game do two strangers with Social Anxiety play? Don't Break the Ice"

"WAITER:What would you like? ME:What would YOU like? W:Excuse me? M:No one ever asks you, do they? W:*tearing up* No.. they don't. Thank you."

"Video Games made me do it. Rock n' Roll made me do it. Witches made me do it. Satan made me do it. - a short history of responsibility"

"Threeway or gangbang If five pre-civil war slaves are gangbanging someone, is it considered a threeway?"