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Joke of the Day
"Canadian castles... They really aren't my fort-eh."
Next Joke
"A woman asked me if I had a cigarette. ""Yes..."" I said, ""But what about your baby?"" She said, ""Oh no. He doesn't smoke."""
"What's the difference between E.T and illegal immigrants? E.T actually learned English and wanted to go home."
"Looked at changing my name to Bieber so I could get RT'd. Realized I can't b/c I have a penis."
"What do you call a snobby criminal going down stairs? A condescending con descending"
"When your friends start with the Dead Baby jokes, hit them with this (NSFW): How do you blend a baby? Feet first so you can cum in its mouth as it screams."
"Bad guys gotta have a meeting and decide once and for all Liam Neeson's family is off limits."
"Did you her about the boy that was born without any eyelids? They used the foreskin from the circumcision to make them. I guess you could say he was a little cockeyed."
"Is your cat getting enough Chinese food? The answer may surprise you. Mews at 11. NEWS. I said ""news"". Just like a typing human would. What."
"Disclaimer: My jokes are not always based on true events. Use as directed. Side effects may include genital swelling & loss of lunch."