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Joke of the Day

"My (black) coworkers informed me that black people can't get lice? ""You know what else they can't get? Good jobs."" I received a write-up :("

"What's the difference between me and my couch My couch pulls out"

"I was at a gay nineties party last night. All the men were gay and all the women were ninety."

"I don't care how old I am, I will see Finding Dory."

"Why are redneck murders the hardest to solve? All the DNA matches and there's no dental records. Edit: made it to the hot page, my dad would be so proud, if only he knew who i was"

"I never made it as a firefighter. I thought arsonists were people who hated arson, so every time we met one I thanked him for his support"

"What do you call a chinese woman with a food processor on her head? Brenda."

"poor guy. The cashier seemed to appreciate that I bagged my own groceries... Until I unpacked them all & said, ""That's how I want you to do it."""

"What's black and never works? Decaffeinated coffee you racist bastard."

"Did you hear about the stolen Tesla? I guess now it's an Edison"