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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the stolen Tesla? I guess now it's an Edison"

"How many tries does it take to get to the front page? A LOT."

"How does the Easter Bunny stay healthy? Eggsercise particularly hareobics!"

"Your Parents divorced because your Dad didn't want to put your talentless paintings on the fridge."

"What has four wheels and flies A Garbage truck"

"There's two things I don't fuck with... Rattlesnakes. And Condoms."

"Me: When I have a rough day, you're there. When I need to cry, you're there. Nobody helps me gain 10 pounds the way you do. Cheesecake:"

"If people on Twitter found a horses' head in their bed at least 3/4 of them would get a selfie with it before calling the cops....."

"If I reject your call the first two times, ring me again. I'm really just testing your resolve."

"Why are female inmates bad at grammar? Because they have their period in the middle of their sentence."