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Joke of the Day

"Diarrhea is hereditary. Apparently it runs in your jeans."

"Thank you, iPhone predictive text, for sending my mother a message that said ""WOOOOFUCKYEAH!"" There's no joke here except I'm 30 & grounded."

"Died twice today Screw you daylight savings"

"What does a guy from Philly dunk his pretzel in? a girl from Jersey."

"Kentucky Fried Chicken has introduced the new Hillary Bucket. Two large thighs, two small breasts and two left wings."

"I hate working with Jewish fishermen. They always ask me: ""What's your net worth?"""

"Why did Microsoft name their new operating system Windows 10? Because Windows 7 8 9!"

"I asked the pizza place to write a joke in my pizza box. They delivered... the pizza with nothing written inside."

"What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four-year old child? Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!"

"How do you sink a norwegian submarine? Swim down and knock on the hatch. (In Sweden we have a running tradition of telling jokes about stupid norwegians. They do the same about swedes)"