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Joke of the Day
"Sixteen sodiums walk into a bar... ...followed by Batman."
Next Joke
"Me: It's not illegal to be rude to cops. Them: Well, if you poke a bear, what do you expect? Me: That's why we don't make bears cops."
"What did the clock say when he was finished having sex? The time has come."
"What did the regular expression truck driver say when he saw the number 10000? 10{4}"
"A bandit walks into an old west bank... and yells, ""alright, I want all you mother stickers down on the ground - this is a fuck up!"""
"One day a wife complained.. ""This wall clock almost killed my mother today. It fell only seconds after she got up from the couch."" The husband grunted and replied, ""The darn clock always was slow."""
"I once met an Italian fellow with feet made entirely out of rubber. His name was Roberto."
"I've been nominated for person most likely to not be nominated for anything."
"Sometimes you just have to go with the flow. ~Menstruational Tweet"
"STEVE: ""Wanna go star gazing tonight?"" ME: ""What is that? Like a sci fi movie?"" S: ""No we watch stars."" M: ""Wars or Trek?"""