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Joke of the Day

"What kind of jokes does a priest tell? Dad jokes"

"I saw my ex getting beaten up by half a dozen thugs. For a second, I thought, ""Should I help?"" Then I thought, ""No...6 should be enough."""

"A nurse goes to the bank As she is about to sign her name on the deposit slip she pulls out a rectul thermometer, ""awww crap some asshole has my pen."""

"I was once stoned in Memphis And I entered this weird contest where you had to walk on famous Jessicas. I was walking with my feet 10 ft off a Beal."

"I took an instagram picture of a polaroid photo and my iPhone blew up."

"Did you hear about the Patriots? I personally think it's all overblown."

"the guy who named eggplants, pineapples, and Guinea pigs is all the same guy"

"Where's the middle of nowhere? It's three letters in. ""H""."

"You know how birds fly in a v formation? Do you know why one side is longer than the other? It is because that side has more birds."

"Teenage son gets academic honors every year in school, yet he can't cut a straight line with a lawnmower. I believe I am being played......"