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Joke of the Day

"Be careful of shoe thieves I hear they're afoot."

"A power-tripping mod finds a comment he disagrees with... [deleted]"

"When someone with a lisp says bismuth... You know they mean business."

"What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? ""Hold onto your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow job."""

"What happened to the horse that ate a duracell battery? He went on furlong-er."

"Stand Up Comedy Yes, I actually did some stand up comedy, but I didn't like it... every time I would get up on stage to do my routine, all people ever did was laugh at me..."

"What's the difference between an oyster fisherman with epilepsy and a prostitute with diarrhea? The fisherman shucks between fits."

"Son: Is it true? Dad I heard that in ancient China a man doesn't know his wife until he marries. Father: That happens everywhere son everywhere!"

"Don't smoke Unless you're on fire, then it's natural."

"It was time to show my girlfriend how i really feel.. so i showed her my hands.."