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Joke of the Day

"[car dealership] ""Why is some guy out there screaming insults at all the vehicles?"" *Sees sign PRE-OWNED CARS* ""Oh."""

"I think what I despise the most about blind people is knowing they'll get rid of that dog as soon as they start to see."

"What kind of gum do astronauts chew? Hubble Bubble"

"Why was the pig unhappy in the Minors? Because he wants to play in the Pig Leagues."

"What do you get if you cross a rooster with a jar of peanut butter? A cock that sticks to the roof of your mouth."

"Don't mind me, just practicing how to make tables on reddit :---------|:---------|:--------- |Winner|loser|description"

"Woman: Guys who can't make me orgasm really rub me the wrong way."

"I think my girlfriend is breaking up with me for playing too much videogames.. She says its ""just cause"" but either way I think its a pretty silly thing to fallout 4.."

"Who's the most popular guy at a nudist colony? The guy who can carry two cups of coffee and a dozen donuts."

"Man walks into a bar and asks, ""Can I have a Colt 45?"" ""Sorry Sir,"" comes the reply ""We have sold out"". ""OK, no problem, can I have a Luger and Lime instead?"""