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Joke of the Day

"Why did the relationship between the creationist and Organic molecule not last ? Because the creationist did not believe in carbon dating."

"Pete Townshend and Roger Daltrey are to star in a new film, a murder mystery set at a music festival. It's a Whodunnit."

"So, my feminist cousin is diabetic and recently, her legs were amputated... ...safe to say, she won't be jumping to conclusions anytime soon."

"Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was too tired..."

"I love it when I run into people I know at my psychiatrist's office... Because I'm like, ""Hey, you're crazy too? Cool."""

"Good news: It works the other way around. I entered ""internal bleeding"" & ""unconscious"" in WebMD and it said I have a stuffy nose. Phew."

"Had to pause Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory to go buy a king sized Snickers. This is why i can not watch Breaking Bad."

"You're an open book? ""Throws you into a bonfire."""

"Wife: It's time for a vacation. Me: Where do YOU want to go? Wife: Hmm... Maybe the Bahamas? Me: Great idea! And, I'LL go camping upstate!"

"What did the doctor say to the speeding commuter? Thank you for your patients."