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Joke of the Day

"Dear microwave companies, Why make us select ""cook"" at all? Does my appliance have a calculator function or something? Sincerely, Everyone"

"What kind of ants are very learned ? Pedants !"

"If you came over an upturned tortoise... Would you clean it up?"

"pls explain this joke: ""For a good time, call (415) 642-9483"""

"Are you today's date? Cause you're 10/10."

"Ancient artifacts hint Jesus may have had a wife and kids So he likely suffered a lot more than we think."

"Difference between jam and jelly You can't jelly your cock in a girls ass"

"How many moles are in a guacamole? Avacado's number."

"What're nuts on a wall? Bob: What are nuts on a wall? Dan: walnuts? Bob: What are nuts on a chest? Dan: Chestnuts? Bob: What are nuts on your chin? Dan: Chinnuts? Bob: No, dick in your mouth!"

"Everyone stop over reacting! There was no Earthquake.... I slipped in the shower, these things happen..."