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Joke of the Day

"Why did the cowboy get a dachshund? Cause he was told to get a long little doggy."

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a 6 offender."

"Thug: *shows tattoos of tear drops* So I remember each person I've killed. Me:*shows tattoo of an oven* So I remember to turn off the oven."

"There once was a mouse called Keith Who did circumcisions for free with his teeth; He didn't do it for pleasure, Excitement or leisure... He did it for the cheese underneath."

"Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans. Credit to my younger brother on this one"

"In 4.5 billion years the sun will burn out but on the plus side no more sunset instagrams"

"Why did the campfire turn into a forest fire? It wanted to get off its ash."

"What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."

"How do you know when you are in bed with a witch ? She has a big ""W"" embroidered on her pyjamas !"

"Unless you're planning to lay there shirtless in an open casket, there really is no point to killing yourself with diet and exercise."