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Joke of the Day

"When do accountants laugh out loud? When somebody asks for a raise"

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"I just had my tubes tied, and now I'm........inconceivable."
"I don't know why they don't let priests marry and have kids seems like a great way to guarantee they don't have sex."
"What's the difference between a fraternity and a gang? Gangs don't have to pay for friends."
"Judging by this line at Costco it doesn't look like I'll ever see my family again. Sweet."
"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick Question! Feminists can't change anything."
"Why is it best to wear leather when sneaking around? It's made of hide"
"What do you get if you cross a skunk and a balloon? A creature that stinks to high heaven!"
"I'm moving to Ottawa and opening a gym. I'm gonna call it Capital Gainz."
"Guy calls his doctor... He says, ""I figured out what's been causing the pain, doc. Avocado!"" Doctor: ""Did you research that?"" Guy: ""No, I just pulled it out of my ass"""