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Joke of the Day

"Sent my ex a card that said, ""Get better soon."" He's not ill, just really crap in bed."

"From my 7 year-old son: What rhymes with 'boo' and really stinks? You. Why I oughta...! Edit: Wow, thanks for all the love. My son is quite the character and he really caught me off guard with this!"

"Me: I found this in the fridge with your name on it. Are you gonna eat it? CW: That's my stapler Me: You didn't answer my question"

"What did the pirate say when he saw the dank meme? arrr lmao"

"How can you make a gay man scream twice? Fudge him real hard. Then wipe your dick off on his curtains."

"I know Mexican culture is big on traditions: baptism at birth, ear piercing as a baby, but what's the one they do when they turn 15? Have a baby."

"No one is sure how much it cost Coke to sponsor the Paralympics, but it undoubtedly cost an arm and a leg."

"It's like the only thing my kids learned from Snow White is that fruit is horribly poisonous."

"How do you know Kurt Cobain didn't have dandruff? A bit of his head and shoulders were found behind the couch."

"Why did God make pubic hair curly? So we don't poke our eyes out."