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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. What do you call a deer with no legs and no eyes? Still, no eye deer."

"a keyboard walks into a barbershop on the international space station ""i just want an easy, short cut"". then he hit the bar"

"Getting a bit worried, is this normal? One of my nipples is a different colour than the other two"

"Asians are such terrible drivers... ...I'm beginning to think Pearl Harbor was an accident."

"My Favorite Limerick There once was a fellow McSweeney Who put some gin on his weenie Just to be couth He added vermouth And slipped his girlfriend a martini"

"What do you call a 100 year old ant ? An antique !"

"Why couldn't the dimwit read more than one sentence? There was a full stop"

"Saw a couple standing in the park holding each other tightly, silently, not moving. I was touched. Both their phones must've been stolen."

"Thousands of years ago Chuck Norris came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its decendents now have white hair."

"Don't make eye contact with me at McDonalds. We're both here for our own sad reasons."