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Joke of the Day

"Thousands of years ago Chuck Norris came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its decendents now have white hair."

"I wish work was like high school when I could just poop my pants to get sent home."

"Hey cat, how's about I lick myself for hours then puke where you sleep? Don't answer that. Why do I even talk to you. Stop looking at me."

"What did the surgeon tell Michael Jackson before he changed his skin colour? Everything's gonna be all white."

"What did batman say to the joker when he finally caught him? Gotham"

"How many Jews does it take to kill Jesus? You can't kill a myth."

"Friend said I should try new KFC sandwich. I suggested we cut out the middleman & hook me up to an IV of chicken fat."

"A photon goes to a hotel... He arrives and the clerk says, ""Sir may I take your luggage"" the photon then replies, ""No, I'm traveling light"""

"Where do conspiracy theorists keep their ideas? In a skeptic tank. --- (Note: I just made up this joke earlier today. I'm not 100% sure the joke is obvious; feel free to suggest a better wording!)"

"[Romeo and Juliet as turtles] ROMEO: Death hath sucked the honey of thy breath JULIET: I'm just stuck on my back R: we're turtles, Juliet"