120129

Joke of the Day

"To tell you the truth, beginning a sentence with ""To tell you the truth"" throws into question all else you've previous said."

"""Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway? What could go wrong?"" ~My son apparently"

"To some, it's known as ""soda."" Some call it ""pop."" Some even order it as ""coke"" or ""cola."" The spicy bubble brown juice goes by many names"

"What type of wood is the most expensive? Hollywood! (Made this up while i was doing a project.)"

"I want a car horn that shouts obscenities."

"Did you hear about jared from subway? ""Yea he lost like 200 pounds"""

"*Pops up from the backseat as you're driving* *Duct tapes your neck to the head rest* Now, why are you telling people I'm crazy?!!"

"How much sex do couples have? Newly weds: ""Tri-weekly."" After 10 years: ""Try weekly."" After 30 years, ""Try, weakly."""

"If my life is like a highway, I sure hope it's like an interstate Lots of opportunities to get off"

"[weather guy on TV] ""Today there will be 12 clouds. One is called Simon"""