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Joke of the Day

"""Be right there! I just need to rip my lovely real eyebrows out & draw shitty fake ones in their place."" -Thousands of women"

"Want to hear a corny joke?? Then please, lend me your ear."

"What is the greatest right given to Muslim women? The right to remain silent."

"What's long and hard and fucks old people? Osteoporosis"

"School says strangers are handing out lick on LSD tattoos. I told my kids not to worry, no one is giving out good shit like that for free"

"I thought my publication about fish living on land would be a big hit Too bad it was just a flop"

"My wife told be that I don't understand the concept of irony. Which was ironic because we were in the car at the time."

"A Scotsman, an Essex girl and an alien walk into a bar... The landlord looks up and says, ""What the hell is this? Some kind of a joke?"""

"Women who brag about multi-tasking should chill out. There is nothing cool about doing 3 things wrong at once"

"Ladies, the next time a guy has the courage to talk to you, remember he's not wearing makeup. Also, remember what you look like without it."