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Joke of the Day
"If you slept with my husband I'd be like ""OMG how much do I owe you?"""
Next Joke
"What's the best thing about having sex with twenty-two year olds? There are twenty of them."
"I like my coffee the way I like my women... Anyway I can get them."
"Why are power tools good for bank robberies? They know the drill."
"Really, there's no need to ever take your kids anywhere fun because they can just sit and complain at home for a lot less money."
"How do you know you are in a real lesbian bar? Not even the pool table has balls"
"Why did the chicken cross the road? ""Why?"" To get to the gay-cunt's house. Knock knock. ""Who's there?"" The chicken."
"When does a joke become a dad joke? When the punchline becomes apparent! (Credit to the first dad who said this) EDIT: I fucked up the joke, thanks /u/Daviddddddd"
"Why is Christopher Walken so tired? Because at night, he's always sleepwalken"
"My girlfriend and I finally decided to try out role-play in the bedroom. I dressed up like Luke Skywalker And she pretended to be a dead fish."