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Joke of the Day

"This guys talking about ""Calm down, everything happens for a reason"". Then he gets all angry when I punch him in the face. What a hypocrite."

"What did one ocean say to the other? ""Check out this awesome plane I got! I hear Malaysian is a pretty rare brand."" ""Nah man, they aren't; I got one too."""

"You sneak into my room, unnoticed you gently touch one bit of my naked body after the other until you find the most desirable place, then you start sucking. Stupid mosquitoes!"

"How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. The question is how they got in there."

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None because feminists can't change anything."

"Man has sex with dead corpse That's my fetish."

"Why'd the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field."

"What did the Native American pornstar call himself? Spread Eagle"

"Why did Pinocchio's nose get longer? Because he told his wife he cheated on her."

"What do you call an Asian guy that always shows up before he needs to? Earl Lee"