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Joke of the Day
"What's grey and comes in quarts? An elephant."
Next Joke
"What's bruked, broke, and fucked all over? The country!"
"Today's the 3rd anniversary of my joining Twitter. Also the 3rd anniversary of the last time I spoke to my family or read a book."
"Who is bigger - Mrs Bigger or Mrs Bigger's baby? Mrs Bigger's baby because he's a little Bigger."
"If you have more than 4 kids I automatically refer to you as a hoarder."
"What do black coffee and Ginger Baker have in common? They're both terrible without cream."
"How do you get a woman to stop texting you? Reply to her message within a minute"
"*wakes up in hospital* What happened? ""It was a heart attack"" Will I be ok? *a big heart outside slowly taps on window with a bat* ""No"""
"My wife and I made a vow to never go to bed angry. I'm so fucking tired!"
"Son, Do U Also Treat Piles. A Couple In Train Girl- My Hand Is Paining, Boy Kisses The Hand, Girl- My Neck Is Paining, Boy Kisses The Neck, An Old Man Asks Boy, Son, Do U Also Treat Piles."