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Joke of the Day

"Why is Ashley Maddison the best hook up site on the Internet? Because everyone got fucked."

"What do you call a cat with 3 legs? A handicat"

"Turns out if you fake a heart attack every Monday work sends you to HR and not the hospital."

"I heard that #TheDress debate has already destroyed 18 relationships. These people probably shouldn't be breeding anyway."

"A chemist and his friend walk into a bar... The chemist asks for some ""H2O."" His friend asks for some ""H2O too."" His friend dies."

"I hear Bristol Palin is pregnant again... Ever since Trig was born, she's been Down to fuck."

"I'm handling Monday the same way I handle constipation. Gritting my teeth and wishing it pass already."

"what did the doctor say to the midget? you'll just have to be a little patient"

"Riding a big girl is like riding a moped... Its okay until someone sees you"

"The older I get, the more I think I owe my parents an apology..."