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Joke of the Day

"The only thing I want written on my tombstone is ""I'm standing right behind you."""

"Guys GUYS wait! Stay awake, for God's sake stay awake because I just found out if you die on Twitter YOU DIE IN REAL LIFE!"

"""that's the power of German engineering"" is a great slogan for your product if you're selling fear"

"Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? So he could get a long little doggy!"

"Why does the Pope shower with his briefs on? He doesn't like to look down on the unemployed."

"Fox news in four words: ""I'm not racist, but..."""

"how does Justin Bieber remove a condom? He farts."

"Who is the most famous cow in France? Albert Camoo"

"A women's work that is never done is the stuff that she asked her husband to do."

"What do you get if you cross a woman with a whale? Your research funding suspended and a severe reprimand from the ethics committee."