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Joke of the Day

"Guys GUYS wait! Stay awake, for God's sake stay awake because I just found out if you die on Twitter YOU DIE IN REAL LIFE!"

"I had to ground my 8yo son for this one [NSFW] Son: Dad, why do you have to wrap a bunny in duct tape? Me: I don't know son, why? Son: So it doesn't explode when you fuck it! Me: Son: ( )"

"Why were Ru Paul and Buffalo Bill at the park? They were at a Tucker family reunion."

"What's the difference.... Between my girlfriend and santa? Some people actually believe santa exist."

"I bet Abe Lincoln only paid with $5 bills then as the cashier's face lit up, he'd smugly grin ""yep."""

"ME: I want to take long walks with you. HER: Aww...are you a romantic? ME: No, I don't have a car."

"Scientists have now changed the name of periodic table element 117, formerly known as ununseptium, to Chogenon. CHOGENON DEEZ NUTZ"

"Any joke can be a one liner ^^^^^^^if ^^^^^^^you ^^^^^^^write ^^^^^^^small ^^^^^^^enough."

"I would tell a good chemistry joke right now But all of the good ones argon"

"Bar joke What has two thumbs an craves a blow job? This guy!"