117356

Joke of the Day

"What would a diatomic Calcium molecule look like if existed? Like Crap or Feces (its the same) WHY? Because its Ca=Ca (equal sign is a double bond)"

"People who talk with your phone on speaker like it's a Star Trek Communicator - we're trying to have a society here. And everyone hates you."

"TL;DR The fine bros me: i'm allergic to peanuts fine bros: is that an allergic reaction? me: yes fine bros: see you in court"

"what jerk ever looked at a hamburger and thought ""you know what this needs? A nice, soft, warm piece of lettuce."""

"What's sad about three black guys driving over a cliff in a Cadillac? They were my friends :("

"Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken."

"My Muslim coworker brought a CD version of the Quran to work today. He got really pissed off when I asked if I could burn a copy."

"Sometimes I wonder if the ghost in my house thinks he's being haunted by some angry, naked, drunk guy."

"Give me that! You're going to hurt yourself! *takes toy *hurts self with toy 4: Hahahaha"

"How many people with alzheimer's does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the otherside!"