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Joke of the Day

"When is a door a container? When it is ajar!"

"Bernie Sanders may be old, but he loves modern technologies such as. . . Socialist Media."

"I recognize that Rome wasn't built in a day but I'm not trying to build Rome, I just want to to enjoy onion rings without gaining weight."

"My boss said he wanted the fire drill to be as realistic as possible, but then he yelled at me for looting. Make up your mind, bro."

"""I don't like the taste of water"" - First World Problem"

"So I saw one of those ""Drink for Pink"" labels on a bottle of juice... Sounds like Georgia Tech's hookup strategy."

"White Girl What do a white girl and a tampon have in common? They're both stuck up cunts."

"Want to hear my impression of an extractor fan? I used to like tractors, but I don't anymore."

"""PS, I love you"" -- Me to my PlayStation."

"I love going over to my girlfriends place, her parents give me money when I leave! You know being a babysiter and all."