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Joke of the Day
"Doctor: are you sexually active? Me: why, what have you heard?"
Next Joke
"Thank you for showing me your Facebook wedding album. Now if you have time, here is a slideshow of my top 36 scores in Mario Kart"
"My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself."
"What's big, green, fuzzy, has four legs, and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A pool table."
"[campfire] And that's when he realized... HE FORGOT TO ENABLE WIFI AND WATCHED 5 SEASONS USING HIS DATA PLAN [everyone screams in terror]"
"""Rain, rain, go away, come to a poor African nation watered only by tears."" Bono's nursery rhymes are the worst."
"Why are giraffes so tall? Because cheetahs are faster."
"The United States could save billions in defense funding if they trade the Military for Chuck Norris."
"I want a million followers so I can tweet where I am from anywhere in the world and emergency shit at someone's house."
"I want to tell the sun to stop being so self-centered But the world does revolve around him"