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Joke of the Day
"My sex life is like Coca-Cola; first it was normal, then light and now zero."
Next Joke
"Knock Knock -Who's there? -The pilot. Let me in"
"In the future I will replace my feet with chainsaws after accidentally cutting them off with my chainsaw hands."
"Loyalty Test... Wife buys 12 underwears of same color for hubby.. Hubby- Why same color sweetheart. people will think I never change my underwear. Wife- Which people Total silence..."
"Dolphins thats just a kids TAIL (get it)"
"Apparently champagne is the easiest alcohol to digest, so I'm going to consume several bottles to wash down my salad."
"I am so perfect... ... I only have four flaws. 1) I lack humility. b) I'm inconsistent. Finally, I can't count."
"My superpower is turning food and drink into larger pants."
"[Interview] Boss: What's your greatest strength? Me: I'm a risk taker B: Can you give an example? M: *Passionately kisses boss* B: omg"
"what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? nsfw an erection"