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Joke of the Day

"I bought myself one of those ""off road vehicles"" last week... Paid $3000 for it, got it home and found out it was a Canoe!!!"

"I used to work with this black lady who had one arm and one leg... ...we called her Elbony"

"BREAKING NEWS Paula Deen's snack mix now contains ""Brazil Nuts"""

"Why does your sister have yeast and shoe polish for breakfast ? Because she wants to rise and shine."

"How did the Girl Scout Samoa cookies get their name? Because after you eat one, you want samoa!"

"Avoid the horror of watching your children's nativity this year by using a condom approximately six years before you have to attend."

"Q: Knock knock. A: Who's there? Q: Control freak. Okay, now, you say, ""Control freak who?"""

"when i was a kid i never trusted stairs. those bastards were always up to something."

"How fast can Klingon's run? About Warf speed. My mom made this joke up last night at a bbq party. She likes to think she is funnier on holidays. Thanks, Mom."

"What do you call a cantaloupe who can't elope? A cantaloupe. The spelling is completely different..."