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Joke of the Day

"My friend and I were talking yesterday and he asked me if I sometimes randomly recited the English vowels. I replied, ""Sometimes, why?""."

"Why is King Kong big and hairy? So you can tell him apart from a gooseberry."

"A woman runs into a panhandler on the street... Panhandler: ""Would you please spare me some change? I haven't eaten in three days.."" Woman: ""Well, you've gotta force yourself."""

"Where do animals go when their tails falls off? The retail store"

"Dinner at Cracker Barrel My wife and I at Cracker Barrel tonight. I looked around and said ""looks like we're having dinner at the nursing home."""

"Someone please tell my mother she won't get a free iPod by clicking the links. She's convinced I just don't want to show her how to use it."

"What is the interior temperature of a Tauntaun? Lukewarm"

"What did the people who hung Jesus to the cross say? Nailed it"

"Did you hear about the new Canadian pornographic news network? I'll jizz here, eh?"

"Why was little Billy so sad when his friends played on the swingset? He had no arms. Sorry that joke was stupid, let me try again. Knock Knock ""Whose there?"" Not Billy"