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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about Ku Klux Knievel? He tried to jump over 8 blacks with a steam roller."

"Not sure if i should be proud of this or not, but our employee handbook had 37 new rules added since i started working here."

"My GF was brutal when we moved. Told me anything not used in the past 6 months had to go... I just looked down and gave my condolences"

"Why did the guy spend the entire day throwing out his surplus of herbs? He had too much thyme on his hands."

"You know what's funny? An unexpected shift in context."

"I changed my last name on Facebook to ""dis"", so I can start disliking the stupid stuff people post"

"wife: ""what on earth are you doing?"" me: ""making a penguin"" wife: ""that's a pigeon"" me: [opening freezer door] ""not for long"""

"""Premature ejaculation man I NEED HELP!!"" I'M COMING!"

"What is a mother's favorite Christmas Carol? Silent Night."

"Question about storytelling. If I stand on stage, with four spotlights behind me, no matter how I tell the story, is everything I do going to be four - shadowed?"