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Joke of the Day
"Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected."
Next Joke
"Who's bigger- Mister Bigger or Mister Bigger's baby? Well, Mister Bigger's baby's a just little bigger."
"whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? pizzas dont scream when they get put in the oven."
"How does a watch maker tell you he likes you? With a romantic tock."
"What is green and smells like pork? Kermit The Frog's finger."
"In light of Jeremy Clarkson's recent firing from BBC... If James May quits in return we will all be in dis-May."
"I just heard 2 waiters speaking Chinese and then one said very loudly and clearly, 'MEDALLION' so I think some shits about to go down"
"The doctor said I have Matchbox 20/20 vision . . . Typical RobThomatrist."
"unstable person: ""when there is no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth"" stable person: ""i look after the horses"""
"I update my Facebook picture to a jail mugshot over the holidays so my family will go visit someone else."