115740

Joke of the Day

"I was gonna put on my cowboy hat and sit on my patio shirtless to showcase my abs when I realized I don't own a cowboy hat, a patio, or abs."

Next Joke
 
"You know you have something special w someone when u start finishing their sentences. But enough about me & my local Subway sandwich artist"
"Be good to yourself, you're all you've got."
"What did the bee say to his wife? No on knows. It's a Mister Bee."
"A man is about to jump off a skyscraper... but before he is able to, a physicist runs up to him and yells, ""No! You have so much potential!"""
"An Englisman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says ""What is this, some kind of a joke?"
"How do you kill a circus clown ? Go for the juggler"
"If you've never had a 4 hour conversation about which cartoon character gives the best blowjobs, then I question your commitment to tequila."
"Rejected names for lumberjacks: -Woodroberts -Treedaves -Logjeffs -Forestbills -Timberjims"
"Disclaimer: My jokes are not always based on true events. Use as directed. Side effects may include genital swelling & loss of lunch."
Terms & Privacy