115528

Joke of the Day

"Wife: hey take me out tonight. Me: can it wait till tomorrow? Wife: why? Me: because tonight's not garbage night, tomorrow is"

"Helpful hint: You can park wherever you want if you put your hazard lights on and take your tire off."

"How come when someone goes to sit down and the seat is dirty they use their hand to wipe the seat then wipe their dirty hands on their pants? What was the point"

"How does Ice-Cube drink his milk? Straight Outta Carton."

"What's the smallest drink you can order at a bar? A mar tiny."

"""Here you go body some nutritious food, how bout some energy?"" Body: ""I shall make this into nose hair"""

"Brains are awesome... I wish everyone had one."

"What do Led Zeppelin and New Orleans have in common ""When the Levi breaks, we have no place to stay"""

"An ESL student accidentally bought a middle Engish dictionary... ...and hath furnished many a quipster and baffoon with merriment and jocularity"

"A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage ""No, I'm travelling light"" \[]/"